But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
