i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
