Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
