were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
