you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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