i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
false alarm. still invincible.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
