she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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