you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize