Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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