His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
She bit a glass in half.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
