how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
