Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
