Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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