just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
you had me at cake vodka
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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