That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize