what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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