Non-Jews are for practice
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
