he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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