I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
i've created a new STD.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
