if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize