I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize
