how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
