Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
