no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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