It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
