i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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