GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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