just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
he fucked my hip out of place.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
