R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
