a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
