***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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