didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
