I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
