I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
