Duck Duck Cougar?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
