Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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