He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
