they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
