I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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