I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
