I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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