yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
