I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
It's blow job season.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
