Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize