I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
