Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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