meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize