i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize