I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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