He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Fuck appropriateness.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
