i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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