Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
